When it’s this real it never fades

This is why I don’t wanna love u:

I don’t want to get upset at your habits.
I don’t want to think about how what I say has any correlation to our past.
I don’t want to want to be your priority.
I don’t want my face to light up when I see you.
I don’t want to sit here knowing you want me but won’t show anything.

And yet I hated not hearing from you,
I hated not having you pretend in front of others I’m not your priority,
I hated not being able send you words that would leave you shivering,
I don’t like to love you with nothing in return.

You think this is it.
We fall for someone and oh, well, whatever. That’s it.
Nothing to be done about – if this is The Person, it won’t be your choosing.

Maybe that’s all it is for you, an attraction of lips and embraces

Hours of silent conversations that never started.

You don’t know what my heart does to me because of you.
When it’s this real, it never fades.

Miss Mess



About iheartmess

A Middle Eastern Londoner 20-something living the 'western' life in between London and home.
This entry was posted in Fears, Love and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to When it’s this real it never fades

  1. maryfollowsthelamb says:

    I can relate to your words. Wow, can I!
    But here’s an interesting thing I learned about myself. Sometimes I choose to love someone who is unavailable to me because I really don’t want a relationship. I want the trappings of being in love, but not what comes after.
    Just a thought…


    • iheartmess says:

      I completelyy agree! Not only do I choose to love the unavailable, but the fear of being in a relationship is enough to make me mess up whatever ‘normal’ relationship I do start.


  2. serenityluv1 says:

    LOVE IT!


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