With the onset of a new year, a new start, even if unwanted, him and I fell apart. He played my childish games of boyfriends past. I let him. He soared through my infatuation with ease and ego. I watched him. My eyes twinkled and his did too, but I saw him break my heart with her. I cried for him.
Thereafter I used my free time and pretended to move on. He let me.
“You have to pick your battles. The difference between people is knowing when to say something and when not to.”
“What battle? I’m a pacifist. I don’t believe we’re in a war.”
“Then why did you start with the passive aggression? If it wasn’t about a fight, about making a point?”
“Desperation. Poor education. Lack of experience of what I should do to fix something.”
“Fair enough. But you’ve picked your battle now, either walk it and fight it, or turn around and apologise.”
“It can’t be those two choices only. It really isn’t that easy. I don’t want to fight, that’s the problem. And I’m not wrong to apologise.”
“Then don’t. You can do whatever you want to do. You need to decide what that is.”
My 2013 resolution: decide what I want to do, then Do It.